Off Topic
Three More Players Sent to the Door
August 28, 2057: Marshall Islands – Still focused on financial moves as the season comes to its grinding demise, Bikini Krill executives announced the latest in player divestitures, this time coming in the form of shipping three players to rival squads for essentially nothing.
Well. For $2.
The Krill sent reliever Joe Jackson and outfielder Todd Rice to Long Beach for a whopping buck. Then turned and sent Lee Stone to Phoenix for another buck, though they agreed to retain half of Stone’s salary to make it happen. All total, the two moves are estimated to save the club something short of $1M.
“We’re always sorry to see anyone have to go through that Door and leave the Bikini family,” said assistant GM Dustin Zuniga. “But none of the three were going to factor into next season, and all of them had suggested they were going to look to free agency – though we think Todd (Rice) might have been swayed if we wanted to go above and beyond.” (narrator voice: They did not want to go above and beyond.)
The deals would appear to bring to an end a long string of actions Krill management has taken to slash costs and increase revenue. Best projections say the efforts have been successful, and barring dangerous moves made during late night binging, various accountants suggest the team will be in considerably better financial shape going into next seasons’ free agent period.
“I thnk they sold everyone they could, and then gave away the rest,” said Peabody Nearby to Forever Land Sports Network anchor Misty Morgan. “I don’t think they’ll be able to spend to cap, yet. But I could see them at least being out of debt. That should mean the payroll could probably grow out past the low 80s we saw this season.”
No announcement was made on who might be joining the team, but the Krill have a long list of minor leaguers who could use a cup of Joe.
August 28, 2057: Marshall Islands – Still focused on financial moves as the season comes to its grinding demise, Bikini Krill executives announced the latest in player divestitures, this time coming in the form of shipping three players to rival squads for essentially nothing.
Well. For $2.
The Krill sent reliever Joe Jackson and outfielder Todd Rice to Long Beach for a whopping buck. Then turned and sent Lee Stone to Phoenix for another buck, though they agreed to retain half of Stone’s salary to make it happen. All total, the two moves are estimated to save the club something short of $1M.
“We’re always sorry to see anyone have to go through that Door and leave the Bikini family,” said assistant GM Dustin Zuniga. “But none of the three were going to factor into next season, and all of them had suggested they were going to look to free agency – though we think Todd (Rice) might have been swayed if we wanted to go above and beyond.” (narrator voice: They did not want to go above and beyond.)
The deals would appear to bring to an end a long string of actions Krill management has taken to slash costs and increase revenue. Best projections say the efforts have been successful, and barring dangerous moves made during late night binging, various accountants suggest the team will be in considerably better financial shape going into next seasons’ free agent period.
“I thnk they sold everyone they could, and then gave away the rest,” said Peabody Nearby to Forever Land Sports Network anchor Misty Morgan. “I don’t think they’ll be able to spend to cap, yet. But I could see them at least being out of debt. That should mean the payroll could probably grow out past the low 80s we saw this season.”
No announcement was made on who might be joining the team, but the Krill have a long list of minor leaguers who could use a cup of Joe.
