Dear Eyechart,
You know how guys always say "I'm in the best shape of my life" even after a winter of noshing chips and dogs? God knows I've done that, specially down in New Bayou!
Well, coach, I'm in the best shape of my life for reals. A lot of it is cuz of this new dev lab they got going throughout the BBA. You'd think a guy like me would hate something like that! But, I figured I had to do something if I want to meet my FatFIRE goal (insert tongue out emoticon here).
Seriously though. When I ruptured my Achilles back in April, I thought I was done. What did you say to me when I called you? You said "17 years." I can't believe you remembered that bet. And here it is in writing: it's still on. I match your years playing in the BBA, you give me your etoufee recipe.
So I agreed to go to this dev lab. Well, they framed it such that "you've been selected." So, kind of an honor? I mean, they picked only 10 guys throughout the entire system. And me and Ayyad were the only position players. I don't know if everybody else begged off or if they selected me because I was - and am - the highest paid guy in the org. Probably the latter. But maybe not cuz Ayyad makes peanuts.
They had Ayyad do these reflex drills, had him playing racquet ball and squash all day. Hell, he even got some cricket in with the Northwestern team. Dude was signed up to get better at bunting.
Meanwhile they had me doing weight training, weights, condition, and cooking - yes, I prepared my own food and not just fried catfish!
They even wanted me to try a little J'Kulo but I was like, no thank you. I got that shit 24/7 when Melucci and I were rehabbing together for a bit. You remember Melucci, right? He was with us for what, one month in '55? Strange dude. But I do have to say that maybe there's something to J'Kulo because Melucci got back on the field way way sooner than people thought he would.
Our dev lab turned out to be pretty sweet. It was all up at Northwestern University in Evanston. Beautiful facilities, right on Lake Michigan. You'd think they'd do better in the Big 10. Guy running the lab was a young guy, Ert Plabes. 0% body fat, bulging calves, super sick dude. Skate boards old school on an old Reggie Barnes. Bonded over that.
His deal is this whole body mind thing. Hence J'Kulo. Some meditation (yada, yada, yada) but also a weird emphasis on sleep and sleep positions. "Sleep technique" he called it. A lot of it has to do with the timing and content of your dinner. But also heart rate control. Nutty stuff but it's surprising what you can control your body to do. I also found out that I have a deviated septum. Most likely 100% of catchers in the league have a deviated septum.
Ert had me doing a lot of stuff in the pool, which was very cool. Nothing like sexy coeds to make you wanna do more laps or tread for thirty min. But once the ice cleared, he got me out on the Lake. Which is nuts because this is March in Chicago and the water is freezing. But you know all about the importance of cold water.
But I finally freakin' learned how to surf. Part of the program and yes, there is surfing on Lake Michigan. Waist high waves if you're lucky, but I'm good with the typical 2 or 3 feet waves. Skateboarding skills def did translate.
I think one of the best new things though was the dry sauna! OMG, dry sauna rules. You gotta get one of those installed in your clubhouse. I asked Santino Vitale about it and he's like, "What TNT wants, TNT gets." (So if the call to send me here came from Vitale, it's a good thing I agreed to go! That dude ain't no joke.)
Dev lab was tough but fun. "Gotta honor your body. And you honor your body with your mind." Melucci has that on a shirt or something but I was feeling it up at dev lab. Ert said I did great and I feel great. I mean, I was wrecked but now ... not so wrecked and ready for the season.
Weren't you always giving me shit for my patented dozen beignet breakfast?
I'm sure the Crawdads got something similar down by you. Can't believe you yourself ain't managing somewhere, though. You must still be making the big bucks sitting on your rump all day. One day you must tell me what exactly is your job besides patting Gilly's butt.
TNT