--Henry "Natural" Jones: listed as SS, in the lineup at third base, yet his "Natural" position appears to be left field. But hell -- who cares? The guy has 135 RBI as we write this, tops in all of the MBBA by 15 RBI, and 40 HR. And those fertility drugs are 'cuz he really, really wants to have a baby, honest.
--Resurrection Santos: apparently a speedy centerfielder, hitting an even .300 so far, and a good 100+ runs scored. But what kind of name is Resurrection, for cryin' out loud? No quotation marks, so its not a nickname. Nevermind, I'll be quiet as long as he keeps hitting.
--Chet 'Rocket' Steadman: hopefully he's no relation to Charles Rocket. But a stud pitcher if there ever was one, with 21 wins, 2.21 ERA, 1.22 WHIP. What's this? A note from the team trainer: Steadman's injury history is characterized as 'fragile.' Let's wrap him in gauze now.
--Daniel Marquette: 43 saves, and making less than $2M. Remind me not to give his agent my cell phone number.
There's a bunch more, guess I'll try to learn their names. The only things I've done at the end of September is to rest a bunch of the regulars so we're ready for the playoffs; don't want them making any excuses about being too tired, you know.
I should rent that again, now that he's on my team.